Originally published in The Aquarian Weekly

December 3, 2008

Kevin Smith

Count Basie Theatre

November 7, 2008

—by Ken Shane

RED BANK, NJ—Last night I was fortunate enough

to be offered a last minute ticket to see Kevin Smith’s

return to the city of his birth, Red Bank, NJ, for an

evening of storytelling and question answering. I

had seen the first of the three “Evening With Kevin

Smith” DVDs some time ago, and been thoroughly

entertained over the course of the two discs that

were recorded at several college appearances.

When I arrived, I learned that the last time that

Kevin appeared at the venerable, and newly

refurbished Count Basie Theatre, he had spoken

for seven hours. Now, I like Kevin as much as

the next person, but that seemed a bit extreme,

and I was already plotting the escape I would make

after a couple of hours. When he hit the stage

though, Kevin made it clear that he was only going

to speak for three or four hours this time out. Still,

it seemed rather daunting to me. Even Bruce

Springsteen doesn’t play for four hours anymore.

The audience itself was interesting. Fanboys,

costumed superheroes, and movie fans all mingled

in the sold-out house. Some had come in pajamas,

anticipating another long evening. There were

jerseys reflecting Kevin’s Leonardo roots (and the

setting for his first film, Clerks).

The first hour or so found Kevin in full story mode.

After airing his disappointment at the book office

receipts for the opening week of his new film, Zack

And Miri Make A Porno, he felt the need to address

his rather obvious weight gain. To illustrate the

problems related to his added girth, he told a

hysterically funny, and blissfully profane account

of a toilet that couldn't quite handle his presence,

the tragedy that followed, and the mortification

that resulted.

Next he connected the weight gain to the joys

of his rediscovery of marijuana, and the eating

binges it inspires in him. The combination of the

pot, the 103” TV that he was given by Panasonic,

and the advent of Blu-Ray discs, have resulted in

a very content, but very inert Kevin Smith.

Then it was time for questions and answers, and

hopefuls lined up at four stations in the hall. There

was a lot of fawning, and a lot of “Thank you, sir,”

but there were also some good questions about

Kevin's process, and future plans, lots of Star Wars

talk, and comic book discussion. Movie fans found

satisfaction in some inside dope on filmmaking

technique, and dealing with recalcitrant actors.

There were some touching reminiscences about

George Carlin, who appeared in two Smith films,

Dogma, and Jersey Girl.

Answers could be as long as 30 minutes, and

were never dismissive, no matter how silly the

question might have seemed. The audience also

felt free to add their two-cents at any given moment.

In his final act of the evening, Kevin romantically

united a young man and woman who had driven

platonically from Ohio for the show, to the audience’s

delight.

At no time did I feel like leaving, even as the

evening wore on, and on. True to his opening

remarks, Kevin went for just over four hours, and

was completely engaging, uproariously funny, and

truly interesting throughout. It's not a show for the

kids, but a great one for anyone with a ribald sense

of humor. There are very few celebrities in any field

that are as forthcoming about their personal lives

as Kevin Smith. There is no question that he seems

unwilling to answer, and his responses are always

unflinchingly honest, and boldly impious. The

straight talk express indeed